Last time on Dragon Pirate Z

Back on Earth...

On a minor note, I completed the New Super Mario Bros.  Not the new one for the Wii, but the one on Nintendo DS.  Best game I've played on the DS ever.  4/4.  I'll give it a more proper review later.

For all my dozens of adoring fans reading my blog, I wanted to let you know.  If you haven't been following my Captain Harlock-esque adventures in the deepest reaches of outer space, now's the time.  In this post, I will recap all the important things to know.  WITH PICTURES!!!

Back in space...

As me, Ash, Lee, and Sayoko enjoyed a short space flight from the planet Kattox to its neighboring planet Reeva, I reflected on the people, places, and things I've seen recently.  I recorded this information on a Google Doc so I could pull it up when I arrived back on Earth and post it to my blog.

Recently I was pulled backwards through time by just a few years.  The reason for my trip and the exact person who did it are still up for debate, but I must seperate the information into stuff from the past I currently inhabit and the future I came from.

The Current Past

Biographical Information

Ash and Lee

Twin sisters of Kattox, these girls are the daughters of an energy tycoon, owner of Fraction Industries.  Ash likes to keep her hair shorter and is more outspoken than her mysterious sister Lee.  Lee claims to have been responsible for sending me back through time.  I am under the impression that her future self sent me backwards through time.

Ash and Lee's Father (Name never mentioned)
[No picture available]
President, founder, and owner of Fraction Industries, this man is wealthy and has two beautiful daughters.  However, he suffers from Askreeves Syndrome Intergalactic Format, a virus that usually only causes common cold symptoms, but in a few rare cases is terminal.  I have agreed to help Lee find a cure to ASIF that may exist on the planet Reeva.

Sayoko

Childhood friend of Ash and Lee, Sayoko was on a vacation cruise when I crashed into the sea after time travelling.  Lee's future self gave a cryptic message saying that I will be responsible for Sayoko's eventual rise to the corrupt head of Fraction Industries.


Locations

Kattox - Prosperous planet widely known for Fraction Industries leading producer of Refractor crystals, an energy source with a nearly limitless output.

Reeva - Currently prosperous planet covered by 80% oceans.  The people of Reeva are very industrious, but are heavily dependent on Refractor Crystal power.


The Previous Future

Bios

Ash

In the future, Ash has become a member of my pirate crew, the only member so far.  She displayed the ability to be reborn like a phoenix in a previous fight in which she died.

Lee - In the future, Lee was transformed into a Cthulu monster, but we restored her human form through battle.  Before that, Lee had been in charge of Fraction Industries, but after reports that she activated a WMD that destroyed the planet of Reeva, she was quickly replaced by Sayoko.

Sayoko - Most recent head of Fraction Industries, Sayoko is a devious and possibly dangerous business woman who may have had a hand in the destruction of Reeva.

Jack Haley

A ninja-robot charged with protecting an important Refractor crystal, Jack lost a duel with me when I used the awesome power of N.O.  In the prescence of this infinitely expansive power, I believe Jack has gained human-like consciousness.  I have not seen him since that day.

Locations

Reeva - In the future, Reeva is a decimated wasteland uncolonizable by humans while its sister planet Kattox remains stable.


When we arrive on Reeva we will search for information concerning the cure to ASIF.  I'm hoping that if I continue to follow the events that are unfolding I will discover a way to return to my own time.  That way I can get back to my ship.  I miss her.

Until next time fellow pirates.

P.S.
Pictures are all stolen property of some poor souls on Deviant Art, various artists.  I edited some green hair into some of them ;)

Top Tier Tiny Terror!

Presenting
The One and Only
Small and Sinister
Master of  the Microscopic
Tiny Tyrant of all Time...
DRUM ROLL PLEASE!

Badabada

Badabada

Badabada

Badabadabada

Badabadabada

Badabadabada
Badabadabada
Badabadabada
Badabadabada
Badabadabada

Master Jinx himself

Probably the second hardest boss in Super Mario RPG: Legend of the Seven Stars, Jinx is tiny.  It's hard to make out what he is and left highly to interpretation.  He appears to have a red cape and a funky green hairdo, but to be honest, it's anybody's guess.  With a plethora of instant kill moves, many of which are difficult to block, this little guy means to show you up not once, not twice, but three times.  That's only after you've earned the honor to meet him through battle.

Thanks for tuning in, this concludes Tiny Terror Week.  Back to your regularly scheduled programming.

Tiny Terror Five

Half-Life 2 had some notably scary enemies.  Headcrabs were among the smallest.  However, the scariest part of Half-Life 2 for me was Ravenholm and its poison headcrabs.  These things dropped you down to 1 life instantly.  Granted the life recovered slowly, but they made this nasty hiss/rattle sound and it freaked me out.

Tomorrow is the Final Tiny Terror.  The Tiniest, Terroryest Tiny Terror of all.  Look forward to it.

Tiny 4 Terror

The single most broken character to play in Timesplitters as is the monkey.  He's fast, he's too short to hit, and he's got guns.  I really have nothing else to say.  This guy is scary because he's small.  Oh and he has guns.

Wait, I thought of something scarier.

The Ninja Monkey.

Tiny Terror Three

The last Metroid is in captivity.  The galaxy is at peace.

That is until PETA comes after Samus for exterminating the entire metroid species for the 50 billionth time.  Now some metroids are not tiny, not tiny at all.  Metroid Prime from its namesake game fills an entire two story room.  However, when you say Metroid to a fan, the first thing they think of are the little ones.

Vicious little space vampires that suck your life force dry, these foes are usually encountered late game, and are by no means instant death, but they drain your health faster than anything else in the game.  Samus Aran, star of these critters titular games, is often tasked with killing all of them, over and over again.  Despite their vicious nature and her indiscriminate genocide of their kind, fans always tend to remember the soft spot that Samus Aran had for one little baby metroid in Metroid II that was a major part of the plot for the best game in the series, Super Metroid (Metroid III).

Tiny Terror Two

Throughout the Final Fantasy series there have been some keepers and ever since it's debut in FF5, the tonberry has been one of them.  Deceptively easy looking, this short fellow will kill you... run... oh but swipe a megalixer first and then morph it to a ribbon.  Then run.

Tiny Terror Week; Blog Response

Back on Earth...

My friend the Bengineer recently hosted a Big Bosses week, and I think he did a decent job with his choices.  But my 1-up manship knows no bounds, therefore in response I decided to do my own Big Bosses week.  Feeling that was redundant, I now have a new theme.  Tiny Terror week.  This is for all those baddies in videogames, though short of stature, did not lack deadly skill.  I have six wonders of the microscopic video game world that I will be releasing from now, til Friday.

Starting with...

Kamikaze Grunt!  Grunts from the Halo series are short, but usually not deadly.  Even the elite grunt forces are usually not much of a challenge.  But in Halo 3, our grunt friends take on a new hobby: suicide bombing.  The only thing scarier than seeing one of these guys lit up is hearing the bone-chilling screams of their highly similar counterparts from the game Serious Sam.